ConTENplations

Ten Things I Think in Ten Minutes

1) Do I need to make bread?

2) I need to exercise, that’s what I need to do! No more bread…

3) We have that new exercise ball, I could do those sit-up things for a bit.

4) Will sit-ups make my abs *poochy*? Cuz that would stink.

5) Does it matter? They’re poochy already…duh. Oh yeah. That stinks.

6) Can I look that up on Pinterest? Of course – you can find everything on Pinterest.

7)  “Exercises for abdomen muscles”

8) I hate all this ‘Thinspiration’ crap.

9) I really really hate all this ‘thinspiration’ crap. People need to not be so obsessed with their weight – this is ridiculous!  People think they’re fat if they aren’t a size two… it’s awful.

10) OHMYWORD that bread recipe looks AWESOME… I’m going to try it.

You have 10 minutes – what are you thinking?

TENptations

10 Things I am Tempted to Do

1) Straighten things, such as; the canned food on the shelf at the grocery store, business cards on counters, flyers stacked on tables, hangers in the clothing department, pens in cups at the bank teller’s window. Always. It’s a habit. And people stare at me like I’m nuts or something, which I’m not. Just sayin’.

2) Throw Everything Away. I get into moods when the only thing that will soothe my fevered brain is a good toss-fest. Clutter – storage – other people’s personal belongings (not really) they’re all subject to being ruthlessly gone through and ‘trimmed’.

3) Leave bizarre notes for my boss… I nearly always give in to this guilty pleasure because I can’t resist picturing her face when she comes in the next morning and reads that I’ve fed the annoying customers to the gnomes who live under the building. I’m not sure she totally gets my sense of humor, which makes it all the more delicious.

4) Not match up my socks, I like to have them all helter-skelter in my drawer. It seems a little like I’m just asking for trouble, just picking fights with the dryer fates  to purposefully group something in pairs that we all KNOW end up as lonely singles in the end. There’s no way around it. Let’s get them used to being on their lonesome in the first place.

5) Delete my social life. Again, it’s a weird mood that comes over me when I feel over-stimulated and I want to just shut it all off and sit in a dark room to decompress. I think there is something to that – so many bloggers I know happen to also be slightly socially *challenged*, maybe we like the fact that we can turn all the blog social stuff off and walk away if we need to… I don’t know. We can socialize at will, on our turf, on our time. Intense bunch, I’ll say!

6) Ask strangers personal questions -even though I know it’s weird and rude and a little creepy. But I want to know… I want to know it all, their that’s why and how comes, where they’re from and where they hope to go. (Yes I said that in my best Bogart Voice)

7) Use way too many movie quotes in everyday conversation. I think it’s a homeschooler thing… The more obscure, the more British – the better.

8) Write intensely encouraging letters to no one in particular and leave them in a busy place for other people to find.

9) Eat Food. Always and everywhere and at all times.

10) Give up sleeping. Because I’m busy, you know?

Your turn – what tempts you? The latest best-selling novel? Chicken nuggets? Shoes? Let’s have  it – we’re friends here, spill….

I’m Falling for Ten

It’s almost September, you crazy people! Summer is almost over and I want to run through our not-so-crowded streets sounding the alarm. We need to soak it up Now- the heat – the swimming- the watermelon –

Do All The Summer Things While You Still Can!

And then again, we are getting all sorts of scandalously awesome Autumnal things in at work which has made me go gushy over Fall. I love Fall.

But I love Summer too. And I hate being cold. But I love sweaters. Sweaters are warm and you can’t be warm and cozy in the summer – that’s a Fall thing.

Welcome to my life as a human being who borders on having a multiple personality disorder when it comes to the seasons. I love all the seasons; I love to see them come and I love to see them go, always ready to move on to the next one. I would never survive in a place with no seasons.

 

10 Things I am Looking Forward to About Fall

1) Big Sweaters – because I love them. There is something infinitely attractive to me about being cozy and shapeless at the same time. My wardrobe is rather disproportionately made up of sweaters.

2) Bonfires – because who is crazy enough to go sit by a roaring blaze when it’s 900 degrees out and you’re under attack by a demonic squad of mosquitoes and other hideous summer bugs. Yeah, that’s what I thought.

3) Fall means it’s almost Christmas! (Not really, but kind of)

4) Thanksgiving – my favorite holiday forever and for always.

5) Leaf-peeping tourists. I love a good tourist! Last year I had my picture taken several times as a quaint ‘local’ – how fun is that? Where else can I, a random stranger, be considered a part of some British person’s vacation memories than in Vermont in Fall? And I love the accents, and the clueless driving (although it’s kind of dangerous) and the tour busses full of smartly dressed elderly people from Georgia who can’t understand the way Yankees talk…

6) My body tells me that it’s time to start eating heartier foods so that we can build up enough fat to survive the coming winter. Silly body, we don’t *need* to do that anymore – but let’s anyway, shall we?

7) Warm weather foods! Yay shepherd’s pie and beef stew and hot cocoa and pies. I don’t want to see another salad until May. I’m going to go bake scones and have some tea… ILOVESCONES.

8) Did I mention warm clothes? I talked about sweaters, but I really love all cold-weather clothing. I like being all covered up and warm.

9) The colors. The colors. The colors. I must say, the mountains have their own sort of fireworks display and it’s put on by the trees – the fall foliage is incredible. No wonder people from all over the world come here to see them.

10) Those gray, raw days when it rains and the streets are covered in leaves and everything feels pensive and a little bit sad and so you huddle up inside and drink tea and knit and listen to your favorite music or watch a good period drama. I love that.

Are you looking forward to Autumn? Why or why not?

triple T

I love it when random cool things happen and you’re left standing in the middle of life for a moment with a smile on your face – just because.

Here are 10 Random Things that I thought were pretty cool:

1) Walking past a stranger on the street and being overwhelmed by the scent of their incredibly beautiful perfume.

2) Being sung to by a homeless man in downtown Portland, Maine

3) The person at the ice cream counter was super generous when dishing up our dessert

4) Borrowing someone’s big, ugly wool sweater that kept me dry in a soaking rain

5) Using my new salad spinner to spin the water off our grapes after I’d washed them

6) oil cloth table cloths

7) When I walk into the kitchen *Just* as the timer is going off and I feel really on top of things.

8) Final clearance sale at work and I spent my clothing allowance for the next five years on scandalously cheap hippy clothes. Yuppers.

9) Finding out halfway through my shift at work that I get to leave early.

10) When I wake up in the morning and my hair actually looks good enough from the day before that I don’t have to do it again. Yes, this does happen on occasion and when it does – boy is it cool! I hate fussing with my hair and when I get a two-for-one deal, I’m a happy camper…

 

Alright, I need to hear some cool things that happened to you this week – or has life been pretty boring and uneventful? If so, give us the list of the 10 most boring moments of the week…. we’re all anxious to hear about it.

Ten Things on Tuesday

10 Things

That Make My Husband Smile

*as suggested by Correna*

 

1) Being tickled (he’s rather ticklish, but denies it vehemently)

2) Dinner time!

3) Kisses

4) Dancing

5) Getting home from work

6) When I make faces at him across the table, or…

7) When I try to look angry when I’m not really

8) The antics of little kids

9) Having his truck all clean

10) Watching YouTube videos of baby animals. Yup. We totally do this for entertainment on our mornings off. Our favorites involve baby goats or Harry, the infant pygmy hippo. So Cute.

So, after you go and watch the adorable hippo Harry, come back and tell me what makes your true love smile – –

10 Things on Tuesday

…no, this isn’t me…

Firstly, I would like to thank you all for coming to this week’s smashing edition of 10 Things Tuesdays. We (El’Blog and I) appreciate your continued support and ardent admiration.

*cue polite applause*

10 Goals

1) To continue on with my meal planning efforts until I am actually able to do it.

As I have often heard Mr. Darcy himself say, “I WILL conquer this.”

2) Make all of our own cleaning products and be using them by the new year. And I mean ALL, people. Laundry detergent to hand wash – I wanna make it ALL. Have any good recipes to share?

3) Join the yoga class in town. Yeah, it’s not like I’ve been trying to do this for the past three months or anything…

4) Actually sell things on Etsy.

5) Learn how to put in a zipper. Oooooooooo.

6) Be less of a hermit and work on developing relationships with the people in my actual geographical location; fellow townsmen, church folk, store clerks, random citizens – face to face contacts – like a real human being.

7) Enter the Holiday Season with a PLAN. As shocking as this will be to *most* of the people who know me, I am actually planning out Christmas *now* because I don’t want to be caught unawares. I’m making lists and checking them twice, researching prices and developing a strategy. I feel so corporate. Everybody gets a card. Everybody.

8) Cut out caffeine and fried foods. ACK – the horror, THE HORROR!

9) Read more. Because I am becoming shamefully illiterate. Ugh.

10) Dance more with my husband. Because I get so fiercely involved with all my goaling that I sometimes forget to Dance. And that’s a real shame.

So there you are, speak to me.
Tell me of all your hopes and dreams and goals and how you clean an oven without that god-awful toxic spray they sell at Wal*Mart…

10 things I do

I think that we, the people, should write a song about Tuesday… any ideas?

 

10 Stupid Things I Do

 

1) Stand up too quick, even though I know what happens there after – I usually temporarily pass out due to my low blood pressure. It isn’t life-threatening or dangerous, just stupid and annoying and I do it All The Time.

2) Count the telephone poles as we drive past them. Yup. I also count to the beat of the windshield wipers if it’s raining. No, that’s not weird at all.

3) Use the purple potholder – even though I know it has little holes in it and I WILL burn my hand. Do I remove it from the pile? Nope. Just keep using it –

just keep on using it.

4) Hit the little HOME button on the bottom of my iPod when I mean to hit the BACK button and I accidentally exit from whatever it was I was doing. Annoying.

5) Mix up dates. Always. Just last week I found myself sitting outside next to the road with my overnight bag, waiting for 50 minutes for the ride that wasn’t going to come because the wedding was NEXT week. NEXT week. Take your bags and go back inside, Ann. Now. Just go.

6) Take that first sip of boiling hot coffee from those stupid take-out cup covers that funnel the burning liquid onto your lips. Ouch. It hurts every time, for a long time.

7) Overestimate the time it takes for me to ride my bike to work. On a bike, it takes exactly 1 minute to get to my work. 1 minute. 60 seconds. Then why do I usually leave a good 20 minutes early? In case I hit traffic on the sidewalk going down? In case I develop a cramp and have to walk the last 10 feet? It makes no sense.

8) Go to bed late. Get up early. Drink coffee. Don’t nap. Just keep going.

9) Obsess about my weight. It’s a dumb thing, and I do it all too often, like – almost every time I eat or get dressed in the morning. I need to just get over it, right? It’s that evil comfort zone in my mind whenever I’m stressing or upset about anything else, I take it out on my weight. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb.

10) After 9 Stupid things, aren’t you ready for something a little less demoralizing?

What’s something Not Stupid that I do?

I write this blog for a bunch of pretty cool people that have come from all corners of the Internet Void and decided to share a bit of translucent, web-like life with one such as I, even though I do Dumb things.

It’s your turn.

Ever done anything Dumb?